Cut Me Deep and Hard rewrite
by iKissedJBcho1
Summary: It was simple really, he loved her. All he had to do was accept it. But he couldn't, and because of his stubbornness she's going to die. Will he come around, or just let her rot away...? Edward/OC. rated M for strong lang, self-harm and sexual cont.
1. Intro

If there is one thing that Eos Kara-Elle Blaine is most definitely sure of, is her hate for one boy named Edward Cullen with all of her being. That name made her want to throw up, that name made her dizzy with dread and feel that the merciless chasm of death would take her right then.

He has made sure that every day since they first met in the 10th grade that she suffered and hurt. It was like his mission in life. Almost like he wrote it down somewhere and planned every possible way he could destroy her, like he whispered in everyone's ears… _kill her, crush her soul, destroy her sanity, erase her humanity... _she didn't know what it was that she'd even done to him... but for some reason he hated her. It made no sense.

However, she was already on the edge of self-destruction, he was just helping shove her toward that edge more and more every day. Her family's last name can be recited around the world, her great great grandfather's products consumed by almost 96% of the population of the world at least once… Crola-cola. Yeah, you know of it don't you? Just 4 years ago she and her Mother moved to Forks Washington because her Mother needed a calm safe place away from media and attention to heal after becoming a drug addict, her health in dire conditions.

She started abusing heroin and cocaine because of her father-in-law's suicide 6 years ago. He did it because of the heavy burden that the company was putting on him, or at least that's what his suicide note said… but everyone knew it was because of his wife's death. Margret Blaine had died just the year before of lung cancer that she'd developed from _his_ second hand smoke. In his mind, he had killed the love of his life, his wife, the mother of his children, his best friend… He tortured himself for it every day since she was diagnosed.

And what made all of this even worse for the Blaine family was that Eos's mother was the one who found him in his closet. He had hung himself from his closet beam with his belt. So three weeks after that, Esther Blaine started doing drugs in her kitchen, unaware that her 11 year old daughter could see everything that she was doing to herself, destroying her body. Eos's father had been oblivious to his wife's new habit for several years after because now he had to take over his father's job. He hardly had any time for his family, he still doesn't have any time now…

Eos's first year at Forks high school was the best she's ever had at that now godforsaken and nightmarish place. She knew just about everybody in the whole school, but Tanya Conners was her closest friend. They didn't hang out the same way most people did with their closer friends. She was there only when Eos really needed her, somehow always being there for every instance Eos needed a shoulder. They never went to the mall together or the movies or stayed at each other's house. Eos couldn't let her in so close… Tanya always knew to give Eos space when she wanted it. Tanya was the only person who knew to the true extent how bad Eos's situation was. Eos didn't mind the fact that most of the people at that school were only nice to her because of who she was, but as long as she had these other people around to help her escape the drama and depression at home, she was fine with it.

But all of that so sadly and unfairly changed the day the Cullen's moved to Forks in the tenth grade.

It was the first day of school and everyone was excited for the new kids, buzzing and gossiping. New students were a commodity in Forks, the fact that there were five of them coming was _really_ special, especially after they'd just gotten the Blaine girl. Eos, being the generally nice and kind hearted person that she was decided to show them around the school, new kid to new kids. She walked up to them and couldn't help but notice how incredibly beautiful they were, unearthly really. The five of them looked like they didn't belong there, in that school, in that state or even in that century. They appeared more like princes and princesses, belonging in a royal court, coming down for a day to experience life as a commoner.

As Eos walked up, she cleared her throat softly as she saw they were talking. She didn't want to interrupt or be rude, so she waited for them to notice her standing there. They all turned towards her with slight smiles on their faces and the short one, the pixie looking one with the spiked haircut, grinned broadly at her. Eos held out her hand so she could shake it.

"Hi, my name is Eos, Eos Blaine. I'd just like to welcome you to Forks high school." She said confidently. The pixie was going to shake her hand willingly and happily… but then _he_ interrupted. Satan, the devil, the redheaded demon with the beautiful topaz eyes…

"What the hell are you supposed to be, a pitiful excuse of a welcoming committee? Disgusting... If you know what's good for you I suggest you leave us. We don't need your fake brand of pathetic greetings." He bit at her, hate emitting from him in waves to her. He glared at his sister and she shrank back, standing beside the blonde intimidating one who glared over at him with anger and confusion. Eos just turned around and walked away as fast as she could. She could hear voices in the halls whispering and murmuring nasty things about her suddenly and tears immediately threatened to spill over her eyes. What did she do that was so wrong? She was only trying to be polite to them...

And from that day on, everyone joined in on Edward Cullen's tormenting of Eos Blaine; it suddenly became cool to pick on her and call her names, to taunt and push and kick and jab… just because Edward did it first. All of the people whom she thought cared about her or even generally liked her, turned and became the faces that haunted her nightmares and ruptured her dreams. All except for Tanya, she stuck by Eos and tried to protect her and be her only friend, but even still she didn't do it always or else she'd become a target too. Everyone called her names, things that were fowl and that if repeated would make you turn your head away in shame.

Every day it was like people would place bets to see who could do the most damage to her, who could break her the most, both physically and mentally. She was pushed into lockers and down stairs and tripped and got things thrown at her. But for some strange and inexplicable reason, she couldn't blame anyone else for her pain and suffering but herself. She felt she deserved the pain, she felt that she just needed to be punished even more for whatever is was she'd done to make everyone want to taste her blood so much…

She began to destroy her own self just last year. Slicing into herself, cutting and bruising and burning, helping the process of destruction along anyway she could… after the last football game of the season that year, someone pushed her off of the bleachers, causing her to break her left arm and leg in six places. Doctors tried to call her home to tell of the damage that had been inflicted on her body, but she managed to keep things under wraps. Her mother and Father had no idea of the pain and suffrage their daughter was going through.

She always hid from everything and everybody, her skin breaking regularly, the smell of blood ever prominent in her nostrils, staining her palate; No one ever seeing her in anything lesser than a turtleneck and long oversized sweat pants, her entire body except for her face cut off from the world's view. As time goes on, the abuse from her classmates never stops. The other Cullen's never did anything to her, they were the very few who didn't cause her pain, anyone could tell they were ashamed of what their brother was causing. But even still they never attempted to stop it or tell of what was going on to the very oblivious adult staff of Forks high school.

So there she was alone and dying slowly, every breath a burden, every heartbeat a little bit weaker than the last, every thought of ending her life… she was lost. She was gone… and no one even cared.

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><p><strong><em>AN: So, Hello everyone! As you can see i've decided to give this story somewhat of a second life. I started writing this a while ago when my writing skills weren't all that great. They were alright for what they were at the time, but I feel that i've improved. I'm still working on it, obviously so i might repost it again a while from now. I still haven't made it to finishing this completely, so I also decided to change the story line so it ends a little sooner and i've fixed some logic holes. If anyone has anything to say at all, feel free to leave a review. I would love to be critiqued, constructive criticizim is always appreciated. So, until next week, love and kisses and all that good shit lol c:<em>**


	2. One

**Eos.**

My senior year is here. I'm supposed to be happy and planning for collage, getting excited about leaving this place. I'm supposed to be out partying and having fun, stressing over acceptances and graduation...yet here I sit in the middle of the hallway in Forks High school, wanting to be dead, hating everything about my life, hating _me_… I walked to my first period with my spirit low and sagging to the ground, shoulders ramming into me, making me stumble. I could already tell this year was going to be the end of me. This year was it, I was going to die. I wanted to go home and rummage through my mom's medicine cabinet and OD. I just wanted it to be over. But I'm too pussy to end my life. I wish I had the girth to just fucking do it. I'm sick of this shitty ass excuse of a life I have.

Money doesn't get you any kind of happiness. And whoever thinks it does should switch lives with me, one swift to kick to the groin for you motherfucker.

Over the summer I had acquired a broken rib, and it was still healing so it was bandaged under my clothes. The broken rib was gotten just as every other thing that had been broken in my body, very lovingly shoved into me by some of my fellow classmates. This time I was tripped while walking to the store by a group of guys and landed on a tree root that had been sticking out of the ground. They all laughed as I sat there and writhed in pain, gasping for the air that was quickly escaping my lungs. When they noticed that I was severely hurt they ran away. Like the fucking cowards they are.

I managed to grab my phone from my pocket and to call Tanya and told her to pick me up and take me to the hospital. She scolded me and told me I should let my parents know about this and how wrong it was of me not to tell anyone of the pain I've been going through, but I didn't want to put anymore burden on my parents. They already had so much on their plates; it didn't want to add my abusers and my own petty issues to their lists.

I walked into my Spanish 4/5 class and took a seat in the middle, my knees screaming at me, bruises pulsing at me, arms aching with the horrible itch of healing flesh. I wanted to scratch, so badly I yearned to scratch it, but that would be disgusting. I sat my things on the ground and put my head on the desk hoping this day would go by faster then the others, not that anyone would be listening to my pleas for mercy. I felt the ground vibrate next to me as someone pulled the chair out from beside me. I looked up just slightly surprised someone decided to sit next to me.

What I saw made me want to scream in horror. Edward fucking goddamn Cullen sat down next to me and I already felt the tears I was to be soon crying readying to spill over my eyes. I couldn't stand another year of his teasing, taunting, jeering and picking. Although surprisingly he never physically hurt me (most of the time anyway...) he would say the vilest things to me. Once he even told me I should just go hang myself from my closet like my grandfather and put us the rest of them out of their misery; that my life was of no value, that the air I breathed in was a waste and make him sick.

_WHY THE HELL ARE YOU SITTING NEXT TO ME YOU FUCKING PIECE OF SHIT! _Ishouted in my mind, wishing I had a gun to put to his head, and my own...

I felt a jab in my side where my rib was broken, and a sharp pain shot through me. I looked up to see him looking intently at the board, somehow actually listening to Mrs. Chavez talk and talk. I understood every word she was saying in Spanish, but I wasn't really in a listening mood. I tucked my head back into my arms and I felt the jab again. The pain from my rib nagged at me, his annoying prodding at my injury making my anger grow worse. I ignored it as best I could and just let the tears fall onto my desk.

_Just fucking kill me already you bastard…_

Then he did it again, but this was different. He practically _stabbed_ me, almost punctured my side with his mechanical pencil. I sucked in air to keep from screaming and I felt pain shoot through my side and vibrate throughout my whole body. I felt that I would faint. The room began to spin like mad. I sat up quickly, generating more pain and put my hands over my mouth to further keep myself from screaming and yelling and reaching over to choke the sick bastard sitting next to me. A trill escaped my lips as I shot out of my seat and ran out of the room as fast as I could. I could feel everyone's eyes on me but I can't handle this anymore, I don't care. They can stare all they fucking want. I'm done with this…

I ran outside to my car, and tripped over my own two feet. I slid and scraped up my legs and hands and I thought heard a crack come from my side again. _I want to die… _I repeated in my head as I got up and hobbled over to my car. I got in and started it, and I peeled out of the parking lot.

It was 11:30 at night and I just walked aimlessly in the backstreets of Forks as I held onto my side, pain surging through my body with every step I took. I wasn't trying to go anywhere, I wasn't entirely in my right mind with how much everything in my body hurt. I walked up an alley way and sat up against the wall. I slid down and pulled my Swiss army knife out of my pocket. I brought it with me when I needed a quick slice and to defend myself. It wasn't very much, but it did the job.

I let some of the bangles fall from my wrist and rolled up my sleeves. I popped out the blade and brought it to my wrist, which was already covered with scars, some old and some fresh from last night. I found a clean spot and slowly... I ran the blade across my flesh, making sure I made this one deep. I tilted my head back and sucked in air as I felt it cut through the muscle. The adrenaline rush filled me and I sucked the blood that oozed from it from it as it slowly poured down my arm.

I licked the cut, actually enjoying the metallic taste. Blood has a pleasantly salty and earthy taste to me; I always have to taste it when I cut… I guess you could call me a vampire. _Ha…_ I covered it back up, knowing that it was still going to be bleeding for some time. I put the knife back in my pocket and decided to walk back towards my car to get the gauze I kept in my glove compartment, putting pressure on the cut. Then I heard footsteps coming down the alley way behind me. I grabbed my knife again and turned around, feeling sick as I saw the person come into view. It was a man, tall and heavy set with a disgusting beard that just looked like it reeked.

"Hi there. What's a pretty girl like you doing here at night all alone?" he asked me as he wiped his nose on his coat sleave and then wiped it on his grubby sweats. Sick…

"Nothing concerning you thank you very much. I think I'm going to go now." I got up and turned to start back down the way I was headed. I felt his disgusting stubby hands touch my shoulder and I turned around. "I would appreciate it if you would take your hand off of me... _sir_." I said glaring at him. He just smiled and gripped my arms, and then he proceeded in stuffing his tongue down my throat...

* * *

><p><strong>Edward.<strong>

I felt like crap... no, worse than crap… I thought pushing her like this would give me some sort of satisfaction, satisfaction that I had been right and that I'd never get or experience love or compassion from a human being. She's too good, I don't deserve her. Since I can't have her, no one can… but _this_, this is too much. The destroying of her soul, her heart and her mind… this shouldn't be happening.

I regret that day, the first day I met her, so much. I only thought that it was best to protect her, keeping her away from me, making her hate me… but now I think I was only trying to protect myself. She wasn't the kind of girl to call me a prick and walk away, the kind of girl who'd get over it and write me off as an asshole… she's the girl who takes those words to heart and harbors them and then wonders every day after that what's wrong with her and why she can't be what everyone wants her to be… I've broken something too fragile.

Alice keeps telling me that I'm going to regret it even more than I already do and that I need to just stop now and take her in like she really needs. My whole family is so ashamed or me, but I just keep telling them that's it's what's best to keep her out of our world. We're monsters, vampires, those without souls, disgusting creatures….

"WHAT'S BEST FOR HER? ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME EDWARD?" Emmett yelled at me one night. "THIS IS IN NO WAY WHAT IS BEST FOR HER! IT'S ONLY WHAT'S BEST FOR YOU AND YOUR SORRY ASS! I HAVE A MIND TO KILL YOU RIGHT NOW! IT'S BETTER FOR HER TO HANG WITH VAMPIRES THAN TO BE DESTROYED LIKE THIS!" he was pissed at me because he'd seen firsthand the terrible things the guys on the football team had done to her and tried to do before but he had talked them into doing other things. But all the while he was yelling at me, Alice, Carlisle and Esme just kept telling him that I had to learn on my own.

Whatever that's supposed to mean. I mean, it's not like her life was in danger or anything, she was just being picked on really, a few bad names, a couple of pushes from immature jerks, nothing too terrible I'd thought. I had felt truly bad only because I was letting my family down, especially Esme. It broke her heart, and I hated that. She was my mother and she loves me, she hates to see me make the wrong decisions. But they just don't understand it's the only way to protect both of us from unnecessary heartbreak, the impossibility of it all.

But that opinion sort of went out of the window with what I had found out that day.

I was about to hunt, not because I was thirsty but because I needed to think away from my family, and as I was running up to our normal hunting grounds, I saw her car. It was parked close to a back street that didn't look like anything anyone should ever walk down alone. I became curious as to why she'd be out here alone this late at night and decided to have a look just because when it comes to her I can't help but wonder. Then I caught up with her thoughts, which she usually was good at blocking from me. I don't know how she does it, but she managed to all the time. And what I heard made me feel sick.

_Just slice into it baby, cut away the pain… there that's it. It feels good doesn't it? Just drain it away, forget yourself… good girl…_ her mind coaxed her, images of blood pouring down her arms flashing through her mind and I felt her numbness and pain. She was cutting herself… my mind couldn't process it. Why would she want to do something as stupid as that? No wonder she always looks so miserable. I caught the scent of her blood and grabbed onto the wall, forcing myself not to go into a raging frenzy. How could I never have been attracted to her blood before? Now it wafted into my nose tauntingly and almost drove me insane.

Then as she got up, I caught someone else's thoughts; gross, perverse thoughts about her body. I smelled the man as he walked up to Eos. She noticed him also and gripped the blade in her pocket that smelled of blood and sweat. I could hear her pulse thumping and the blood that was still coming from the slice in her arm tormented me even further.

"Hi there. What's a pretty girl like you doing here at night all alone?" he asked her as he wiped his nose on his arm and then wiped it on his dirty and unwashed sweatpants. He disgusted me as I saw his filthy thoughts. They enraged me. How dare he think those things about her... I wanted with all of my might to run over and end his life within that instant, but my legs couldn't move, I felt stuck.

"Nothing concerning you, thank you very much. I think I'm going to go now." she said curtly and turned to walk in my direction. He then touched her shoulder and a growl escaped my lips. He'd better not even think about it...

"I would appreciate it if you would take your hand off of me... _sir_." she said getting ready to cut his throat. But then he finally set me off as he grabbed her and turned her around then he stuffed his disgusting, filthy smelly tongue down her mouth. My legs could move again.

I ran towards them as she stabbed him in the gut with her blade. He just laughed at her and I grabbed him and lifted him off of the ground by his neck. She stood there in shock, and I told her to go get in her car. It took her a moment, but she obeyed and ran towards her car, well if you could call it running. I threw the worm to the ground, towering over his limp body, fear engraved into his eyes, wondering what kind of man I was…and then I made sure that he didn't wake up for a very long time.

I ran to her right after and she was leaning onto her car, a black bmw z4, and I noticed her shaking as she held onto her arm, pressing down on her wound.

"Are you alright? Did he hurt you at all, are you in pain?" I asked her, trying to rid my head of the disgusting things that that man had thought of doing to her... she was doing the same thing.

"Why...? Is this some kind of sick joke?" she asked angrily, looking up at me, hate enriched every word she said and it stung me like venom. I saw her imagining her body lying limp, hanging from a closet beam. I shuddered. "You set this up didn't you? And even if you didn't set it up, wouldn't you have wanted me to be raped? Or killed? Seems that for someone who wanted me to hang myself from my closet beam... you sure are being heroic." her voice cracked when she spoke of suicide, her grandfather flashing in her mind.

_Motherfucking Cullen, just leave me the fuck alone…_

I watched the tears fell down her face as her face looked at me hurt and questioning, and my whole body then filled with guilt. This wasn't what I wanted to happen…

"WHY? WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU HERE? I WISH YOU'D JUST LEAVE ME THE FUCK ALONE ALREADY CULLEN! I GET IT, YOU HATE ME! FINE, I HATE YOU TOO! IS THAT WHAT YOU FUCKING WANTED? I WISH YOU'D JUST FUCK OFF ALREADY!" she screamed at me. Suddenly, I itched to reach out and wipe her tears away, the pain in her voice and her eyes too much for me... I was then filled with the urge to protect her and make her feel better. My hand reached out to her…

"DON'T TOUCH ME!" she screamed, putting her hands up defensively, flinching backwards… but then she relaxed, and dropped her arms to her sides. "You know what... I don't even care anymore, do your worst to me. Nothing that you do to me now can ever be worse than what you've put me through these last three years. I really just don't care anymore." she said, monotonously as her face blanked out. Then, I swear my heart broke in two as she took another blade out of her back pocket and handed it to me.

"Go ahead...do your worst. Cut me up and throw me in a bag. Just kill me and be done with it, I know you want to."


	3. Two

I took the blade from her and she closed her eyes, bracing herself for what she thought awaited for her. I held the weapon in my hand, and saw traces of her blood on it, dry and caked on. It smelled delicious… I chucked the blade across the street and she opened her eyes at the clicking sound it made as it hit the ground. Then she looked up at me, her face fearful as she thought of the other horrible things that other people had done to her, and imagined me doing them with much more vigor.

"I'm not going to hurt you... how can I hurt you anymore than I already have? All I've done is take this to levels it didn't need to go, you don't deserve this, I would never wish this to happen to anyone. I didn't mean any of those things that I said to you… I only did it to… protect you from me." I choked out the words, because they started to sound more and more ridiculous as I said them. What the hell kind of protection was I giving her? I'm a walking contradiction… she looked up at me incredulously.

"Protect me... PROTECT ME? WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN PROTECT ME? YOU'RE INSANE! WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF PROTECTION IS LETTING ME BE BEAT AND HARASSED BY MY CLASSMATES? WHAT KIND OF FUCKED UP TWISTED PROTECTION IS TELLING ME TO KILL MYSELF YOU FUCKED UP BASTARD? YOU'VE RUINED MY LIFE YOU DISGUSTING ASSHOLE!" she put her hands in her face and sobbed. I suddenly just wanted to hold her, I wanted to cradle her and comfort her and love her, but I'd dug my hole _far_ too deep to ever do any of those things. She'll never let me…

"My life has been nothing but tragedy ever since my grandfather died, and for some reason people feel the need to rub it in my face. I used to be loved, I used to matter... I used to be a _person_, actually viewed as a human being in other people's eyes… now I'm only dirt, nothing to anyone. I don't deserve to _be_ anyone, I don't deserve to live anymore... I wish I could just fix all of this…" she mumbled, honestly shocking me. How did she flip this into being _her _fault? That enraged me. This in no way possible was her fault.

"Don't say that, don't blame yourself. This is my fault, my wrong. I should've stopped all of the people hurting you. I should've tried to be your friend... I wanted to be something, but I was scared and... I am so sorry." I muttered, becoming angrier and angrier with myself as we both sat there in the silence. How could I be so stupid, who was I to think this wouldn't affect her this way…?

Then she took in a sharp breath, a squeal of pain coming from her gaping mouth and she squirmed and held onto her arm. The intoxicatingly sweet smell of her blood burned my nostrils and I held my breath. I reached for her arm and she retracted, fear in her eyes.

"I won't hurt you, I promise." I told her, begging for her to let me see her arm. She held to out to me cautiously, and I took it gently. I removed her bracelets carefully and started to feel her warm blood drip onto my hands. I tightened my jaw and held my breath as I slowly started to roll up her sleeve. The scars traveled all the way up her arm and all the way around, she looked like she stuck her arm in a pit full of cacti and thrashed it around. Some of them were deep and large, some were small and barely noticeable, and some were just indescribable. Blood was coming out of several wounds, including the one she'd just given to herself just a few moments ago. My eyes widened, and she laughed.

"Yeah, 7 for each day; 2 on my right arm, 2 on my left arm, 2 on my right leg, and one more on my left to add to the tally marks. Every day since last June, 3052 slices out of the pie... 53 if you count this one," she pointed to the fresh one and she chuckled darkly. I had no idea it was that bad. Not only was the whole school killing her, she was killing herself, and her death... was totally on my hands.

I was already doing to her what I was trying to prevent. I was trying to keep myself from caring about her, and I was trying to keep her from my murderous nature, from my danger so that I wouldn't have to deal with knowing I was putting someone I cared for in danger just by being around her. My plan had totally back fired and proceeded to blow up in my face more and more. Why am I such a damn screw-up?

"I need to take you to the hospital, these need to be stitched up and bandaged," I said somberly. She shook her head and frowned.

"No, I've been to the hospital 9 times in the last 3 months, if I go again I won't be able to hide it this time... and I can't do that to my parents... your dad is Carlisle right? Can you just have him do it instead?" she asked me, her voice distressed. I nodded, not being able to really even say no to her. Then she thought about her mother in bed having to get a phone call that said that her daughter was harming herself on top of being harassed and abused... a few tears fell down her cheek.

"Okay... I'll take you to my house, and Carlisle will fix you up... and I promise that nothing will happen to you."

* * *

><p><em><strong>AN: sorry this took me so long. I really need to get on it lol**_


	4. Three

**Eos**

I started to get up on my own and my legs screamed at me in protest, resulting in my falling back down. My rib sent out a wave of pain to every part of my body and I let out a groan. A few involuntary tears escaped my eyes from the electric pain that my spine felt. I saw Edward reach out to me, and I flinched reflexively, even though I knew in my gut that he was trying to actually _help_ me up. It was just a habit I had acquired. Whenever people try to touch me I flinch and squirm away, always afraid of what might happen, despite their intentions.

"I'm sorry, I should've asked first. Do you need me to help you up?" he asked me, with the utmost sincerity in his eyes. He truly wanted to help me... I think. I can never tell with him… He reached out to me again and this time I let him pick me up. His hands were freezing, but I paid no attention to it, I was too concentrated on making sure I stayed in his arms. I really didn't want to end up on the ground, or worse...

_Please don't drop me, please don't drop me…_

"I won't drop you... I promise." he said to me, his voice had a... _protective_... tone to it. I was surprised at his sudden want to be nice to me. It even made me a little suspicious… He sat me down in the passenger's seat slowly, careful of my legs and arms, and put my seat belt on for me. His face was extremely close to mine and I noticed he was holding his breath. _Weirdo…_

Soon Edward was in the driver's seat and started off towards his my arm began throbbing with a terrible force; it felt like something was trying to burst from inside of my arm, chewing and gnawing at my nerve endings. I bit my lip trying not to let it bother me too much... but it pulsed and pounded with ferocity. A small yelp escaped my lips and Edward sped up his pace. I noticed his grip on the wheel got tighter and his body tensed up until he looked solid as stone.

We soon pulled onto a path that led to a small clearing, and there stood the most beautiful house I'd ever seen. It was large and white and breathtaking, it sort of reminded me of my own house. I suddenly felt homesick. I hope my mom is resting peacefully… the maid should be in today along with the nurse to give her her medicine… Edward pulled to a stop in front of the house and quickly got out of his seat. He was at my door in a flash, and he startled me. I jumped as he opened the door.

"Damn Cullen, give me a fucking heart attack," I sighed; apparently he didn't find it very funny. His jaw locked and he got a pained and apologetic look on his face. "Whoa bro, chill alright? It's sarcasm," I don't know why the hell I felt bad for making him nervous, I should be using my every opportunity to try and break him in two, revenge for the trip to Hates he's put me through but... no matter how much I've been hurt, I can never find it in myself to fully fight back.

"Sorry, I know… I'm just not good with humor. Emmett says I haven't laughed since '94," he smirked and I felt my nervousness lighten a little at his lack of a sense of humor. Then he scooped up my legs and he lifted me out of the car. I felt that it was unnecessary for him to carry me, but my legs and midsection still hurt like a mother fucker, I probably couldn't even walk. As he walked up to the front door, it flew open and I saw Alice Cullen standing there, her face full of excitement and worry. Excited, I have no idea why she would be excited, but worried, I was grateful for.

"Oh Edward, is she okay? What happened?" her beautiful voice danced in my ears, and she put her hands over her mouth. I smiled meekly at how overly dramatic she was about it. I noticed their father, Carlisle, standing behind her. He stepped forward and Edward stepped inside.

"What happened? Is she alright?" he asked, clearly concerned. Since I was a regular patient at the hospital, Carlisle and I met often. I called him by first name and he was a friend of mine in a way, he knew of the damage that my body has taken over the past 3 years and often told me that I needed to speak up about it, but at the same time understood why I didn't. He'd been almost like a father to me.

"Just the usual, a few opened up though, and my legs and my ribs are sore too." I said nonchalantly as I swung my legs lightly. I looked up at Edward and he looked shocked.

"Yes, Eos is a regular patient of mine, I know her very well. You'd be surprised at how amazingly tough she is, never complaining… she's strong," Carlisle said looking Edward in the eye. Edward shrunk back a little and gave me to Carlisle. Carlisle cradled me in his arms and carried me upstairs, making sure he didn't jostle around; it was almost like he glided up.

We walked past a few rooms, one of the doors were cracked open and I saw Emmett and Rosalie Cullen's shapes sitting on a bed, talking in hushed tones, Emmett sounding slightly ticked. I pondered on it for a sec then let it slide. Not like their conversation was any of my business… We walked into what I assumed was Carlisle's study. I'd never seen so many books in my life, not even in many of the libraries I've been in. I couldn't even remember the last time I'd been to the library. I should try to go tomorrow…

He sat me down on a small bench and I sat up, my rib nagging at me."May I?" Carlisle asked as he bent down in front of me. The throbbing in my arm started up again, and my sleeve was soaked through with blood by this time, the substance dripping down my hand. He slowly removed the bangles I still had on and then proceeded in taking off my hoodie entirely. His eyes held a look of immense sadness in them as he saw how the scars had increased since the last time I'd seen him 2 weeks ago.

"This is very bad Eos, you know that right? You need multiple stitches and possibly a tetanus shot. Some of these are infected. I thought you said you were going to stop doing this. What happened to therapy?" he looked up at me, his golden eyes burning into my brown ones. I immediately felt guilty when I'd realized I had promised him several weeks ago I'd get help for my self-harm issues. I'd told him that I was going to therapy, but I'd never gone to the classes I'd signed up for.

"I'm sorry... it's just that... it's so hard. I'm trying, I'm trying really hard but... my motivation to do anything productive has disappeared. I just couldn't bring myself to leave the house on Saturday's. I just wanted to sleep. I haven't been getting a whole lot lately." I admitted, shrugging my shoulders sheepishly. He looked at me worried. "You haven't been sleeping well? What's been going on, bad dreams?"

"Sometimes..." I mumbled. "And sometimes I don't dream at all. I just get up in the middle of the night and can't sleep again… but when I do dream it's always the same. I'm standing on the edge of a cliff and my toes are dangling off of the edge. There's a red cloud behind me, trying to pull me away from the ledge, and a black cloud edging me forward. In the end the black cloud always wins... then I wake up as I'm about to hit the water…" I don't know what that dream is saying to me, but I know it isn't good.

Carlisle gave me a caring, fatherly look and brushed my hair from in my face, a gesture I haven't experienced in the longest. I was grateful for it. He got up to get some supplies to fix me up when a beautiful woman with gorgeous, shoulder length chestnut hair walked into the room. She gave me a warm smile and walked over to where we sat.

"Hello, I'm Esme, Carlisle's wife. You must be Eos, such a pretty name." she smiled and sat down next to me and squeezed my left hand because Carlisle was about to start stitching up my right arm, numbing it first. "As long as you'd like to, you can stay here. Carlisle and I have been talking about it, and we're willing to help you heal, but only if you wish to. If you don't want our help, you don't have to take it, but just know that the offer is there. And we apologize greatly for our sons behavior, Edward is usually not like this. From what our children and my husband have told me, the way he's treated you over these past few years has been totally unacceptable. We would like to try and make amends." I looked back at her, amazed at her warmth and motherly nature, how it radiated from her, and I couldn't help but to also be amazed at the fact that she was apologizing for her son.

"Thank you, but I don't want to be a burden to you..." I winced as Carlisle finished up and wrapped my arm in gauze before starting on the other one.

"It's no trouble at all. We already feel as though you are a part of our family even though not everyone in our family has shown it… You are a beautiful wonderful person, and all of the things that you've so willingly taken in place of others are truly a wonder. you're an amazing person, who deserves so much more than she lets herself receive, and we just want you to know that there are people who care about you, and we're here for you." my heart melted and my eyes filled to the brim with tears that began to spill over and splash onto my lap. She and Carlisle embraced me and I embraced them, my heart beating joyfully as I cried.

"Thank you..."

* * *

><p><strong>Edward<strong>

I heard as Esme gave her proposal to Eos, and my worries that she would say yes were confirmed. The point of me bringing her here tonight was not to bring her closer to us. I told them after I met her that we should just leave Forks, but everyone argued against me, saying that this was something that I needed. Everyone was telling me that I need Eos… but she'll never forgive me. All of my emotions were starting jumble up and get the best of me, so I went over to the piano.

I started to play a song I had written a couple years ago that I just couldn't seem to finish. I was always stuck on the last chord, and so much was missing. It drove me crazy. It was slow, a ballad, and Alice and Emmett often asked me what it was about. I always told them nothing, but they knew better.

"That is absolutely beautiful. Did you write that?" Eos's voice sang like songbirds in my ear, even though it was shaky from her crying. She sat next to me gracefully and rubbed her fingers along the keys. "I haven't played the piano in years... I wonder..." she traced the keys with her index finger, closed her eyes and started playing a song I didn't quite recognize. Her head swayed and her fingers danced along beautifully.

I didn't know how I had the strength ever to hurt such a beautiful creature, and hide it behind the excuse of protection. My hand itched to reach and run my fingers through her beautiful pitch black hair, which flowed down onto her mid back. I allowed all of my senses to take her in and for the first time, I felt the full impact of how mouth watering she smelled. It was like walking into a fresh bakery filled with all of the most decadent treats. Cookies and cakes, doughnuts and brownies… she was like a beautiful brunch that lay out in front of me, and I so desperately wanted to take a bite...

I got up and walked over to the couch, with a little more attitude than I intended, and sat down. I couldn't sit so near to her, or else I'd lose my mind. She stopped her wonderful playing and looked at me with hurt in her eyes. She got up and looked down as she walked towards me.

"Esme and Carlisle told me that I could stay here for a while so I could get better," she said. "and I told them I would love to, but if you don't want me here then I won't. It's not my place to just come into your home like that. I know you hate me and stuff, so it'd be a little awkward I think if we had to stay under the same roof…" she shuffled her feet nervously and twitted her thumbs. That's when I noticed that she wasn't wearing her hoodie anymore. Her arms were exposed, and I saw the scars fully.

They went all the way up her arms and across her chest. Most of them weren't even from her cutting herself, but from all of the cruel evil things that the idiot teenagers in this town had done to her. She was the most tragic looking I'd ever seen her. I may end up killing half of the people in this town.

"Well, it would be better for me if you left, but you'd be staying as Carlisle and Esme's guest. I have no say in whether you stay or not. It's going to be so whether I like that it's happening or not," I said matter-of-factually. As I said this, I heard Emmett and Alice come down the stairs with Rosalie close behind.

"Oh, don't listen to Edward," Alice piped up, hugging Eos from behind.

"Yeah, he can be a pussy sometimes. I wouldn't really take anything he says to face value," he scowled, and I just stared back at him. Eos chuckled and nodded. Emmett smiled and hugged her, and I felt a pang of jealousy when she didn't flinch away from his touch. She wrapped her arms around him. "You're welcome to us. Since you're going to be here for a while, we don't want you to feel like the unwanted orphan sister, so... here." he pulled out a white box with a bow on top and Alice giggled and clapped her hands happily.

"Oh, wow, you guys, this was really unnecessary. You didn't have to buy me anything," Eos blushed and they all smiled, even Rosalie who hadn't yet said anything. Eos slowly opened the box, and her face lit up once she saw what was inside.

"It's beautiful…"

* * *

><p><strong>AN: two in one day lol :3**


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